"did you hear about the mexican who graduated from high school?"
"neither did i"
an irishman walked out of a bar.
why did the monkey fall out of the tree?
'cause he was dead.
Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree?
Stapled to the first monkey.
Why did the *third* monkey fall out of the tree?
"How many dirty, stinkin' apes does it take to screw in a lightbulb?"
"Three; One dirty, stinkin' ape to screw in the bulb, and two dirty, stinkin' apes to throw feces at each other."
"Did you hear about that new zoo in Europe?"
"they put a fence around Ireland"
-What do you do if you see a guy hopping on one leg in your yard?
-Stop laughing and reload.